Makeup, MMOs, Me & More.

My obsession with makeup, online fantasies, etc.


I'm so worried about how I'm going to get experience or work so the nursing schools will like me. And once I find a place to work or volunteer, I'm know I'm gonna be scared to death - I'm so afraid of doing something wrong! I don't want to get yelled at. Working with patients is a serious thing. I don't want to make them die. Okay, I think I'm getting too far in these thoughts.

I need comfort. I need CB. He's the only one who makes me feel better.

But he's working. He has a job. He has no problem finding jobs, and he's not afraid to work! That's the opposite of me!

I admit it. I'm afraid to work. I'm afraid of being wrong. I'm afraid of being criticized. I just want to make everyone happy.

Seems like this is the thing I have problems with most - making everyone happy.

I need someone to take good pics of me in that new jacket!! Need to find time!

YAY!!! I finally got the new top that I wanted from CryoFlesh. It's called the X-Odus Shrug Top. I love all the clothing on that site. Their designs are just my style - dark and futuristic. It's so hard to find clothing that I like nowadays.

Maybe the pictures I took would look a little better if I had fresh makeup on. I was so excited when CB told me that he was gonna order it for me! :D He's the greatest!
I got a "shit-load" of stuff shipped to me today - this top, two cool scrapbooking books, and the Colony 5 CD, which I'm listening to right now. I like this CD a lot. I got the Dawn of Ashes CD earlier this week. I also got a bunch of textbooks delivered to me in the past week. Am I gonna be able to catch up on all this reading and homework?
I'm pretty cool with all my classes this quarter. I'm taking physics, biochem, developmental psych, stats and archery. I just don't like stats. It's boring, and even though I miss math sometimes, this statistics stuff does not look too fun. But I gotta know this stuff when I'm a nurse. *sigh* And I really gotta know the biochem stuff. Very important when I'm working as a nurse.
Ooo, I can't wait to find a great time to wear that X-Odus!! It's really good for cold weather, and I like cold weather. It's better than hot.

Haven't done much in my physics class so far. But being in here, and seeing the people in the class, it's like, sometimes I wanna be in a more advanced class. I'd probably be working with different students. But why would I wanna do some harder class when I don't need it?

I like this class mainly because the parking spot is not so difficult, and the building isn't crowded like Jack Brown Hall is. Thank goodness. I hope the lab for this class is at least interesting. Lecture didn't seem all that great. But then again, we didn't go over very much in class.

I kinda wish I took the same physics classes as POOP does. That way, maybe I could help her. She'd study better if she had someone to study with!

So happy about my latest scrapbook layout! Just finished it this morning. This is my third layout ever, and if this keeps up, after making several layouts, I'd probably be moving to advanced scrapbooking!

I love this art form of scrapbooking. It's just like graphic design. I was gonna be a graphic design major at Cal Poly Pomona, but thought that computer science was the more intelligent choice, especially because I decided to go to UC Riverside for the UC system. (Plus, my old best high school friend, Matthew, was going there too.)

I can't believe I was gonna be a graphic design major. That would put me in the art department. I can't see myself there. I'm afraid that doing art as a career would make the art grow dull.

Yay. I'm so happy with this layout. The ladies on the Creating Keepsakes message board seemed to like it too. I'm glad I did a lot of journaling. Better than forgetting my experiences completely. I just can't forget, though, that I should scrapbook for myself, and for not for my viewers. But of course, I like it when I get compliments from people, especially from those who are more experienced.

I wanna do another Maple Story layout next. More of a fun thing. It'd be like practice!

Oh, and we got the Xyron 510 yesterday! I love that machine so much! It's not electronic - it's mechanical. It's light. That's what I love about it. So simple - all you have to do is slide the paper in, turn the handle clockwise, and and out comes the paper a sticker!

I can make virtually anything that's flat, into a sticker. Here's the first thing I made into a sticker:

So there's my first sticker, a Maple Story icon. Very pixelated.

All this time, I've been thinking about getting a macro lens for my camera. I found a nice alternative to that: My old camera's lens.

OMG. It's been here all this time, and I never realized I could use it. Happy about that! Now I can take better portraits.... *cough* of myself....

I found this cute stamp at Michaels.

Cute little duckie that makes me think of my POOP!

I feel so, so confused right now. I don't even know what I'm confused about.

I feel very organized now that I've set up my calendar with my class schedules. I will ace these classes too!

I need to get a bow stringer. I really wanna shoot more.

I still want that Xyron sticker maker machine from Michaels. It should still be on sale for 40% off. And I still want to scrap something so bad. Still so afraid of messing things up and not liking it. But scrapbooking is supposed to be an art of making keepsakes that show how I progress and grow.

Definitely not good.

I was over at JoAnn with CB and all of a sudden, my mom called saying she was coming home to take me to San Bernardino's court to do something. Forgot what. So we rushed back home being stressed out, dropped me off, and I put the second laptop away.

They're home now. I don't know what's happening next, and I don't know what's going on other than they're seeing a lawyer.

I wanna go back shopping at Michael's. I just feel like buying something neat to make myself feel better. I know, I'm being girly.

I saw the Xyron machines on sale at Michael's tody! I may be lucky!

I'm so, so tired... I didn't even eat much for lunch... Maybe it's because they're taquitos. After going with Daddy to Joe's mom's garage place to pick up the BMW, I headed home, and impulsively went to Michael's. I've been looking at getting the Xyron machine. Not sure which model yet, but I'll probably discuss that with CB later. I was thinking of buying the small version to play with first today.

Man! I wanna scrap something so bad! I wanna create something! But I've just gotta STOP being so afraid of creating a bad page! I remember some cards I've created, and wasn't too happy about them. But hey, it's okay - I'm still a beginner.

Pretty soon, I'll find my own style, and incorporate some trends into my scrapbooking. I have a idea what my style is, and I'm sure it's not always gonna be that girly style, which is all I see in the stores right now. I wish there were more scrapbooking supplies that go more towards the "dark" side. You know... Like goth.

There are already a few events I want to scrap - the Assemblage 23 concert, the lunar eclipse last month, and some other random things... Spur of the moment things.

So... Yeah. I found those swirly clear stamps online on for $9.99.

Daddy has been nagging and nagging me about selling things on eBay. It's really getting on my nerves. All they every do is make me feel bad. My self-esteem couldn't be any worse. Or is it really all just in my head?

No one in this family's ever happy. Christy is never happy. My parents are never happy. I'm not happy.

Nice family.

OMG. I just ordered my first bow from Cabela's online. Wow. I can't wait!

I also gotta get started with eBay 'cuz Daddy is very serious about selling things, particularly clothes, there. I bet they're gonna look for a mannequin or dressform soon so they can put all my old clothes on it or something.

Looks like we're going to Noodle World now. It's all Mommy's idea.

Man, I've got this sore throat and a cough. Definitely got it from both of my parents.

Archery on Friday was really fun. Didn't learn much, but still fun. I really want to stick with the sport. Luckily, my parents are somewhat supportive about it, and they saw I wanted to practice, so they wanted me to look for an archery range or club so I could practice there. Unfortunately, the closest one is in Chino, and they don't have bows for us to rent - I'd have to bring my own - which I don't have yet. I really want to get one of my own soon.

So later, Daddy figured that going to the range wouldn't be worth it. He'd rather have me practice in the backyard! We went to Chick's Sporting Goods today, but no archery equips there. Right after, we headed straight for Bass Pro Shops Outdoor World. BIG shop. Good thing I went there with CB on Friday, otherwise I'd be lost.

We talked to a guy working in the archery section of the store, Brian. Apparently, he's in the same archery class at Chaffey with me! He was telling me how our teacher really didn't know anything she was talking about. Great. Now I gotta worry about just passing that class. But what he said wasn't too much of a surprise, though. I was already thinking how strange it was that there wasn't much to learn about technique and stance for the first day. I'm sure there's a right way to stand, draw, aim and release...

Brian recommended that I get a PSE Buckeye. I've read about those being good for beginners on LJ before. Plus, there's good reviews, AND it's on sale right now on Cabela' I'll have my eye on that!

After looking at the archery targets and stuff, we looked at guns. So, it wasn't a surprise that soon after lunch, Daddy dug out his air gun from the storage shed. Who knows how long ago that gun's been around! It's a Hammerli air pistol, made from Germany.

In no time, Daddy said I now know how to shoot a gun! He said I had a steady hand, and that's great, for it being my first time! I hit the Pepsi can on my first shot. Amazing!

It looks like my precision is good, and I need to work a little more on accuracy. Daddy wants to take me to fire real guns at a range in the future. I know it's gonna be a little harder 'cuz of the recoil and stuff.

Man, I've been SO freaking tired all day today. I didn't even wanna get out of bed, but MOMMY likes to come in and tell me to go downstairs for breakfast all the time! I need a break!

It was a high of 108 degrees today, and it's gonna be 108 again tomorrow. Are we really going to Redondo Beach tomorrow like Mommy said? I didn't even shave yet. Too tired in the shower, plus I couldn't find my bottle of shaving gel. -_-